Monday, April 4, 2011

Fever...



Spring fever, senioritis and I’M GETTING MARRIED…are seeming to be a deadly combo for productivity, but today I can’t help it. I’m just so excited! This delightfully warm weather , isn’t helping either. Just four weeks left of school, I feel like an old lady when I say this, but really, where did the time go! Seems like just yesterday I was sitting alone in my room in my new apartment in Lancaster thinking, “what in the world am I doing.” Since then I have taken hundreds of blood pressures, bathed many a patient, mastered the art of medication administration, learned everything possible about pneumonia, congestive heart failure, and lung cancer and my most current accomplishment to date, survived…more than that….thrived in my trauma and intensive care rotations! I have cried, prayed, learned, and finally conquered the things that have stood in the way of me and my dream of becoming a nurse (well almost…NCLEX is another story). These next two days will be my last clinical days in my pursuit of becoming an RN. I cannot believe it. I cannot believe that I came all the way from that shaking, scared girl trying to listen to my patients heart beat, to the confidant, knowledgeable woman that I was last week administering an insulin drip and suctioning my patient’s endotracheal tube in the Intensive Care Unit. I have come a long way!
Today driving through the city with my windows down, I had a nostalgic moment. I don’t know if it was the warm breeze, or the sounds of construction equipment, but something took me back to Tanzania, driving in the little white truck through Tarime. My heart literally began to ache. I miss it so very much. A piece of my heart is still in that land, and I will miss it dearly until the day that I return! I know that I am supposed to be here. Mwita and I have a wedding to plan for this summer, and it is my decision to work in the states for a year so that I can learn and become the best nurse for those I love in Tanzania, but oh how not being there hurts! I miss the warm breezes, the smell of chai on a chilly evening, the laughter of those beautiful kids! I miss the sound of Swahili smoothly flowing from the people’s lips, I miss that the days don’t fly by, but rather trickle along slowly, allowing one to fully enjoy each moment. My heart is so ready…but my mind is not, and so I stay here and continue to prepare!
And then there is July 30th- that beautiful date that I will forever remember…our WEDDING! I absolutely cannot wait to marry the love of my life. Mwita is the perfect one for me. He is everything that I need…and more. He is my inspiration, my encourager and truly my best friend. I could not ask for a better man to marry. Lately my mind has been dancing with visions of dainty pink flowers, flowing white dresses, ornate invitations, delicate cakes, and all things wedding. My latest google searches have been flower arrangements and wedding cakes, and the only thing on my Pandora stations are love songs and R&B. I’m dreaming of a summer full of planting an herb garden, refurbishing bedroom furniture and picking out curtains, lamps and dishes! But alas- all this must wait, because today is only April 4th and tomorrow I am sure that my patient will greatly appreciate it if I know how to properly titrate Nitro. Tomorrow my instructor will expect a full rundown of why the patient has elevated white blood cells and the readings for Thursdays lecture are not going to automatically pop into my brain, so graduation, Tanzania and wedding are on hold…and now I’m back to the books….

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Spring...


It's spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you've got it, you want - oh, you don't quite know what it is you do want, but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so! ~Mark Twain